Fuck the world!
Recently a great writing offer came to me in an email.
Hi, I’m such and such. And such and such referred me to you. I got an offer to write a piece for this major publisher that’s offer $1-$1.50 per word to write a piece on buying sex for first timers. I haven’t the time to write it so I’d like to pass it along to you. The editor will be waiting to hear back from you.
Well you know my nipples just got all hard thinking about it. OMG! Could this be my big break! Could I totally be like, getting paid for real for real to write! OMG! like, will my blog get shine and then I become like the most famous Black ho of all time! OMG! Will I be able to pay rent on a regular income as opposed to waiting to see if my clients will resurrect and not disappoint me this month! It was like a dream come true.
So I contact the editor, speak to him even and get th writing. This is all before I finalize details on pay. But I didn’t care. It was about sex and I wanted to write it. Money details will come later.
I write it. Though it’s good he said, it’s not what we discussed. He gives me an example of what the piece should be like and I discuss it with some trusted male sources and I think I get it! I rewrite it thinking, why the hell didn’t he just say he wanted a how to buy pussy for dummies piece. I would have gotten it right the first time.
Anyway, I stay up all night creating this over 2500 word document. My plan was to have some of my editor and writing girlfriend to look it over and give me feedback. All of them are too busy to make this happen, and I’m pissed because I wanted to send it to the editor early Monday morning. Sunday night I hang out and get high and drunk, which is fine, but I had to leave to do things on the road straight from my friend’s house on Monday morning, far away from my laptop. I don’t get home until the late evening. But not before telling the editor that the piece will be coming to him.
He doesn’t seem bothered. No rush. No worries. Well well that was the last thing I heard from him. I sent him the piece on Tuesday, nothing. Wrote him a short email on Wednesday asking if he had a chance to look it over and to tell me what he thought. NOTHING. It is now Sunday and I expect that when Monday comes it will still be NOTHING. Now while I have a slight hope in me that this is just a glitch in the matrix and he will just contact me because he went away on a much needed last minute get-a-way. Or got caught up talking about how they want to make me the next big writing star, I’ve decided to go against one request and send another email.
I try to treat a lot of my life situations like romantic relationships. If this was a guy I was dating, and he all of a sudden stopped taking my calls, would it not be a little pathetic to keep reaching out when you know it’s more than likely this person is getting your messages?
Well that’s the route I”m going. I can take a hint. While I know editors are busy creatures with a lot going on, I can’t embarrass myself further. I mean for crying out loud I didn’t even wait to get word on how much I was going to make for taking the time out to write this piece!
Have no fear followers. I will edit the piece and pitch it elsewhere. If all else fails, I’ll just publish it here.