Sometimes the hardest part about blogging is just being committed to opening the laptop. It’s not that I don’t have stories to tell. It’s that when they are in my mind I’m more than likely not by my equipment to type it up.
Anyway. there are good things to whoring. such as getting enough sexual satisfaction from my clients that I have no desire to chase after what I like to refer to as “civilian men.” It gives me what I need, money and sex, oh and let’s not forget emotional connection. Sometimes the sex isn’t the greatest. And sometimes I refuse to attach. But at the end of the day I am able to pay bills and contribute to society in a manner that is respectful to me. But work sex is just that, work sex. And honestly I am not always being truly fulfilled. A “snow storm” happened in the city and here I am, alone after my last client left with no one to have random talks with, sip cocktails and fuck under the cherry moon. The ho life can be lonely. But when I think about converting back into society as a boring girl, I find out quick that it’s not worth it.
In the past several months I’ve encountered a couple guys that I thought maybe I can make something out of nothing with. But it failed. A weak attempt is an attempt still, but I find that the men in this city are shallow with nothing to offer, and are not open to experiencing something new. Almost makes me want to cry, but I’m too good for that. Instead I’m going to sit here remembering that my work is honest and brings me so much joy.
I could totally do with some passionate sex though. Client or not. Where is the passion. Gah!